No, of course not!
Then which one are you?
No, I’m not a ninja. I’m a doctor, well, ex-army doctor, but just a regular doctor now. It’s nice to meet you, too.
Oh, being a doctor is really cool too. When I was really little I used to want to be an animal doctor so I guess we have something in common.
…Of course it is, Britt! Which is exactly why I won’t ask, and I’m not going to ask you to explain, either!
…Are you just doing that thing where you…um. What’s that word?
I have, yes. We must have just missed each other, I’m nothing like a ninja, I assure you. What is your name? I’m John Watson.
I’m Brittany! So…you’re not a ninja? Well, it’s really nice to meet you anyway.
Oh, well…That’s a shame, I suppose. If I were straight, I mean. But yes, I would see how any chances of…us is over now. And may I ask which one of us is Pumba and Timon? Actually, on the other hand…I think I’ll just leave it up to our imaginations.
Isn’t it obvious, Kurt?
I don’t really know any of you except for the several I came across when I first came here.
Have you been here the whole time? If so, you must be a ninja because I haven’t seen you before.
Oh, no no no! I wasn’t saying I wouldn’t rather have you here, Britt. You’re lovely, really. It’s just…it’d be nice to have more familiar faces around. But I suppose you’re right on some level, I’m…glad you understand? But I love you too, Britt.
Well, obviously. I’m kind of kick-ass, but you can’t make out with me. You had your chance to get with this but I’m with San now and you’re with Blaine so we’ll just have to be Timon and Pumba instead of Simba and Nala.
It had been somewhere between half a week and a full week since Brittany had woken up in this strange place (time was difficult to keep track of without school to tell her if it was the weekend or not) but already she was having a blast. Most everyone else seemed distrustful of the man that had arranged their kidnapping, but she just couldn’t bring herself to hate someone she didn’t know. It wasn’t very fair to him if he didn’t have the chance to show everyone just how nice he was. Maybe Brittany was the only sane person left in this mansion - she was still convinced that he just wanted them to have fun in his giant house. Why else would there be a storage room filled with everything they could possibly need? From what she’d seen in movies, bad guys did things like lock people in dirty dungeons or tell their entire evil master plan to someone - neither of which the kidnapper had done. So until he started laughing maniacally then she wasn’t worried in the slightest.
Well, that wasn’t true. Brittany was worried, but not over her location or situation. As she’d mentioned previously, if there were attack-ninjas lurking in the mansion then it would be no problem to survive the attack. All she had to do was dance them into submission and then convince them to let her join their ranks. Not only would she make a great ninja, but maybe she could figure out how to get Santana here. As much fun as she was having, it wasn’t as much fun as if her girlfriend was there with her. Shrugging off the sudden surge of melancholy, the blonde bounced off to find some sort of bathing suit. Obviously the kidnapper hadn’t brought her closet, but apparently he had stocked it as well as he had the kitchen. There was a large choice and she eventually settled on a little red-striped cut-out number. Only slightly confusing to get on (there were so many straps!), she managed it and almost grabbed a towel. But Rebekah had said she was getting those so Brittany merely tied her hair back and tangoed her way out of her room and down the hall.
Surprisingly, she made it down to the pool with only one wrong turn into the kitchen. Anyone in there might had been startled by the sudden appearance of Brittany in a vaguely scandalous bathing suit and floaties, carrying a large inflatable shark, but she just wiggled her fingers at them and wandered back out and to the pool. Before she even looked for the other girl she flung herself into the water. There was an awkward splash due to the size of the shark and a giggle before her weight tipped her under. Arms and legs were wrapped around the pool toy so the effect was entirely like a loose saddle. No matter how much she attempted to get back up, the final result was the shark sliding and Brittany underwater again. After a few tries she grew tired of it and dragged it over to the edge of the pool, only then glancing around to spot the other blonde with a cheery wave. “Hi! You should totally get in. I think it’s heated or something because the water feels really good.” She bobbed in place, blinking a few times to get the water off her eyelashes, then draped herself over the shark. The floaties made everything awkward but Brittany didn’t seem to notice.
See you there.
This is gonna be awesome. Every pool party needs a shark or it’s not a party. That’s what Jaws was about, after all.